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Monday, November 26, 2007

i love my parents, i really do. though sometimes i just can't fathom their actions, & i just can't see things the way they do.

so its dinnertime and my parents are talking about boring stuff like money and bills and i'm half spacing out and concentrating on my dinner. then the conversation turns to my future (somehow) & my mum starts saying stuff about how i should make preparations for the possibility of me getting a divorce or separation with my future husband, about how i need to protect my assets and how i need to take precautions. eer. ok its sweet in that i guess she's just trying to protect me and doesn't want me to have to go through unnecessary grief. but still. i'm not even married yet! and she's talking about my divorce! if possible, i really don't want that to happen to me? still, i know these things happen more often than we think, and no one who gets a divorce or has anything terrible happen to them expects these things to happen to them. who am i to say that it won't happen to me? maybe i'm just naive, but for now, can't i continue to dream of that 'ideal' life? the one with the sweet & caring husband who understands me, who won't mind my quirks and tempers and lame jokes for a lifetime, who loves me despite my shortcomings.

love is a funny thing. it is shown in so many different ways, and it comes in many different ways! parental love. why bother loving someone who is such a burden? thats a question only a parent can truly answer maybe. but perhaps knowing that someone is depending on you to fulfil their lives makes your own more enriching. love is giving your own life and time and energy to make another life more meaningful.

then there's love between friends. some may think this is the smallest type of love, especially compared to the others. but i do believe, if given the chance to take root, it can really grow to mean so so much. this love is somehow not as committed as the romantic kind of love; i don't mean this in a bad way! of course with any friend, you have to be committed to keep in touch with one another, but its not like there's a written pact or vows made such as in marriage. its less stressful and demanding, yet comforting to know that there are people who will always be there for you, and that there are people whom you are willing to always be there for.

and of course there's falling in love. the love that the media is so fixated on, that we are brought up to look forward to because of movies/music and the ideal notion that love makes the world go round. hence many people are in a mad rush to look for their perfect guy/girl..there's no right or wrong in this i feel..and i'm definitely no expert in this field, but this one amazing thing i do know - its beautiful how a person in love can ignore his/her partner's shortcomings..well perhaps not 'ignore', but accept. we are willing to accept that whole person for who he/she is..that i feel is just...incredible. and beautiful:) falling in love is one thing..the whole phase of being happy talking to/seeing/hearing that person..but what remains after that fades is even more wonderful.

oooh silly me. i've blathered on and on about this. i'm shutting up now.
~me~ at 4:17 AM