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Thursday, November 29, 2007

huh. i always knew i was weird..i guess today is just another shining example of that. it really just wasn't anything i expected..and i don't think it was what any of the nurses and doctors were expecting too. my mum says she was so worried just sitting there in the waiting room..she could see more and more people being called to enter my room. another nurse, a senior nurse, then the radiologist, and they all came out looking puzzled. haha. i am an enigma! i can't say the CT scan was too pleasant an experience though..especially the injection of the contrast medium part :( what a weird weird sensation. but at least now i know what the problem is..
~me~ at 1:27 AM

Monday, November 26, 2007

i love my parents, i really do. though sometimes i just can't fathom their actions, & i just can't see things the way they do.

so its dinnertime and my parents are talking about boring stuff like money and bills and i'm half spacing out and concentrating on my dinner. then the conversation turns to my future (somehow) & my mum starts saying stuff about how i should make preparations for the possibility of me getting a divorce or separation with my future husband, about how i need to protect my assets and how i need to take precautions. eer. ok its sweet in that i guess she's just trying to protect me and doesn't want me to have to go through unnecessary grief. but still. i'm not even married yet! and she's talking about my divorce! if possible, i really don't want that to happen to me? still, i know these things happen more often than we think, and no one who gets a divorce or has anything terrible happen to them expects these things to happen to them. who am i to say that it won't happen to me? maybe i'm just naive, but for now, can't i continue to dream of that 'ideal' life? the one with the sweet & caring husband who understands me, who won't mind my quirks and tempers and lame jokes for a lifetime, who loves me despite my shortcomings.

love is a funny thing. it is shown in so many different ways, and it comes in many different ways! parental love. why bother loving someone who is such a burden? thats a question only a parent can truly answer maybe. but perhaps knowing that someone is depending on you to fulfil their lives makes your own more enriching. love is giving your own life and time and energy to make another life more meaningful.

then there's love between friends. some may think this is the smallest type of love, especially compared to the others. but i do believe, if given the chance to take root, it can really grow to mean so so much. this love is somehow not as committed as the romantic kind of love; i don't mean this in a bad way! of course with any friend, you have to be committed to keep in touch with one another, but its not like there's a written pact or vows made such as in marriage. its less stressful and demanding, yet comforting to know that there are people who will always be there for you, and that there are people whom you are willing to always be there for.

and of course there's falling in love. the love that the media is so fixated on, that we are brought up to look forward to because of movies/music and the ideal notion that love makes the world go round. hence many people are in a mad rush to look for their perfect guy/girl..there's no right or wrong in this i feel..and i'm definitely no expert in this field, but this one amazing thing i do know - its beautiful how a person in love can ignore his/her partner's shortcomings..well perhaps not 'ignore', but accept. we are willing to accept that whole person for who he/she is..that i feel is just...incredible. and beautiful:) falling in love is one thing..the whole phase of being happy talking to/seeing/hearing that person..but what remains after that fades is even more wonderful.

oooh silly me. i've blathered on and on about this. i'm shutting up now.
~me~ at 4:17 AM

Friday, November 23, 2007

If.

If a picture paints a thousand words
Then why can't I paint you?
The words will never show
The you I've come to know

If a face could launch a thousand ships
Then where am I to go?
There's no one home but you
You're all that's left me too

And when my love for life is running dry
You come and pour yourself on me

If a man could be two places at one time I'd be with you
Tomorrow and today
Beside you all the way

If the world should stop revolving
Spinning slowly down to die
I'd spend the end with you
And when the world was through

Then, one by one, the stars would all go out
Then you and I would simply fly away...

- Bread

Ah i think old songs are still the most romantic. :) Its like poetry..

heelp. my throat's dying...haha probably cos of ktv. and my nose is acting up too..like it always does when i first get home..hehe and also maybe cos I haven't eaten any fruit in awhile? sorry my immune system. i better start boosting you.
~me~ at 11:23 PM

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

hehe he ran to me & shouted "ah-yee!" the first time he saw me since i got back..hehe he kept hugging my leg..and then when i told him i had to leave, he refused to say bye to me..only finally screaming "byyee!" and waving frantically when i stepped into the lift..haai. he's such a little heartbreaker:)

so i'm back home once again..the flight back was..uncomfortable :( the air-conditioning malfunctioned, resulting in a really stuffy & hot ride home..it got pretty bad at one stage; the guy sitting next to me was complaining to the air stewardess of chest pain and dyspnoea and then he started hyperventilating! poor guy :( but it got much cooler after we gained altitude at least :)

my sister says my hair is looong. my mum says i've put on weight. my dad didn't notice anything different (as usual). haven't done anything too exciting since coming back, but i've been happy with just enjoying the company of people i've missed:) hehe me and ollie went shopping for textbooks yesterday..yes its rather nerdy to be thinking of exams already so soon after we're back..haha but we have a PLAN. we must STUDY. to avoid the stresses of the crazy last-minute cramming like so in the previous end-of-phase exam we had..haha:)

hehe sorry for the flood of photos..but i can't resist!i just find too many nice photo opportunities around lucas:) haha i hope...next time with my own kid i won't be too preoccupied with snapping away to be taking care of him/her..but then again, nothing compares to the still photos you capture in your own mind..still, photos serve as a good reminder to nice times spent:)



~me~ at 12:10 PM

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

~me~ at 2:33 AM

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

I was just reading through some of my earlier posts when i first started blogging..haha i sounded so childish. but then, some of the predictions i made back then about my life now are pretty accurate. hhaha and i read about the time me and ling broke into the kitchen at creston with a spoon. and how mythili climbed in through the kitchen window to satisfy her cheese craving:) ahhh. fun rebellious times:)

and i had a really weird dream last night..don't remember the details, but i vaguely recall some sort of bright light at the end of a tunnel (as cliched as that sounds)...most people associate walking into the light with some sort of hope for the future or generally something good? haha and i just had a sudden thought..how do you know the light at the end isn't a train charging towards you? hahaha guess thats life. you're hopeful but there's always the chance of something screwing up your plans. still..we shouldn't let that stop us from doing anything:)

& thank you. its a small act on your part but it means alot to me:)
~me~ at 11:47 PM

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

i'm liking trauma week! haha maybe its just cos the hands-on stuff is less boring..we had intubation yesterday..then suturing and plasters today:) my clothes now have that wet market smell on them..cos we were practising suturing on pig trotters..haha..we were told to slit the pig's wrists and sew them up; and i must say, suturing is really not easy..i had no idea pig skin was so thick :( (and the tutor told us that human skin would be even tougher).

haha as for intubation...i broke the mannequin's teeth with the laryngoscope several times over :p plus many classmates made the same mistake as george (on grey's anatomy) by intubating the stomach..haha it was quite funny:)

hmm. the whole house smells of nasi goreng now. hehe..and my neighbours are having a bbq outside my window! huuungry:)


~me~ at 10:33 PM

Sunday, November 11, 2007

i'm feeling rather...distracted now. sighs. many many thoughts...of home, of assignments, of random people in my life, of things to come in the near future. concentrate!

was helping to lobby for world youth day 2008 at church today..things sound quite exciting:) its an interesting thought that people from all over the world will be convening in sydney for a huge huge mass:) and the pope will be here! hmm. and do i look japanese? or indonesian? haha cos i've been asked at least 4 occasions this week if i'm of some race other than chinese.

concentrate!
~me~ at 11:58 PM

Saturday, November 10, 2007

heh slept at 8pm last night..was so tired..and now its time to get some work done!
~me~ at 12:25 PM

Saturday, November 03, 2007

i'm supposed to be doing work..haha but i got distracted and decided to organise the photos in my computer..hehe some photos from the year:)




huungry. foodie time!

phinpeng: haha yea it would have been awful to practise on one another! but ya. hilarious :) :)
xinli: i do i do! haha:)
ruth: for sure! hope the concert preparations are coming along ok dear:) love!
nadine: i want to come back soon too..and i will be :)
jing: yes i am:) ooohh. you will be missed! :p
~me~ at 4:07 PM